Just Fine

What if I tell you
That I'm not fine
That every new breath
Hurts, so, so much

What if I tell you
That I'm struggling
Just to hold all of
Me together, inside

These pieces of me
Are pushing forth
At the seems of my skin
Trying to fly apart

My mind, body, and heart
All fly in different directions
And I'm the one left hurting
But you wouldn't care

Would you, in your apathy
Take a second look
At the pitiful me
Cowering behind the mask

No, you go right on by
And you think I'm holding
Together fine, just fine
Because that's what I say

Isn't it? That is how
I answer the unending question
Of "How are you doing?"
Because I know you don't mean it

No one ever means it
Do they? No, they just ask
A polite nicety
Just obeying mom's orders

So, I play along
And I give the answer
You want to hear
"Yes, I'm doing just fine."